Welcome to the Sunday Hug! Leave your shame, guilt and sin at the door, and put your Compassion Pants on. Every Sunday, I chat about things we often pretend aren’t there – fear, anger, overwhelm, envy. You know – all those things that make us human.
And then everyone gets a hug, because being a human can be hard. We all fall down sometimes. It’s cool. The great thing about falling down is you get to pick yourself back up again. With love, compassion and kindness.
Sometimes everything goes wrong at once. Or at least, it feels like everything is going wrong. Maybe it’s just 2 or 3 things. But that can often feel like the end of the world.
If you’ve been having a hard time lately, then this hug is for you.
That’s what my world feels like right now – I’m totally out of sync, out of flow and nothing wants to go right.
I’ve been grumpy and miserable all week (you can thank the healing process for that.) I seem to have reached the grieving stage on Friday and I’ve spent the last couple days bawling my eyes out as memories I could do without come flooding back in.
And then I found out this morning that my best and oldest friend’s grandmother died and I’m thousands of miles away. She has endured so much loss since I’ve left and I’m her best friend – I just want to protect her from the pain. Or at least be there to bake her cookies and hold her hand.
So I don’t know about you, but today, I’m tired, cranky, and lonely and the last thing I want to do is be compassionate with myself. And my brain wants nothing to do with writing a kind and loving Sunday Hug. I can’t even think clearly.
What do you do when you feel like you’re free-falling into misery?
My first instinct is cookies. My next instinct is a giant cup of green tea, comfy clothes and a blanket around my shoulders. And permission to fall apart. Also permission to pretend that none of it is happening – to get lost in a book or a movie or a video game. To listen to loud music and cry. To not have to be an adult today. To walk and walk until my feet cannot carry me any further. To lie on the ground in savasana and stare at the ceiling for hours.
Most of all though, I try to forgive myself for being human.
Life, unfortunately, isn’t rainbows, sunshine and jelly beans all the time. Some days, things are hard. Sometimes, life hurts.
It’s part of what makes us alive and what makes us human. It’s not always fun. It’s not always pretty. But there’s a fragile beauty about the pain of the human soul.
I don’t have many other words for you today. My words have all dried up. Instead I’ll leave you with another hug and this TED talk by Sarah Kay – something about it touched me, even while my soul is busy crying itself dry.