Forty days from today, I get in a car, and move 1800 kms to Prince Edward Island. Forty days to finish 12 paintings, 2 websites, and one tattoo drawing. It feels kind of Biblical ya know? Maybe I’ll change my name to Eve, or Mary or something. Judith perhaps. Judith was always one of my favourites. (Judith and Holofernes – if you don’t know it, look it up. Good story.)

On another good note, the first painting in the nude series is done!

The first one always takes the longest. I spent 5.5 hours working on the second one this morning, and boy oh boy, it is flying. But I’m also pretty exhausted. It’s a huge painting, so working on it doesn’t just take creative energy – it takes a ton of physical energy too. My left arm is going to be ripped by the time I’m done. (I’m left handed, in case you didn’t know. I’m special like that.)

Everything is going really well – the show is going amazingly, the paintings are turning out so well I’m fairly certain they have nothing to do with me, and oh my god, I’m moving to a place that I love and getting a studio of my own.

I’m happy, and excited, except for one tiny, itty bitty little thing.

Goddamn, I am broke.

And it’s not that business is going badly – business is going great! Every month, my income keeps going up. I’m really stoked about that. It’s just that this month, between buying stuff for leaving, some debt from the Pelham Art Festival last month (big investment there), buying the canvas for the show, and rent, my expenses are running far, far ahead of my income.

So every now and again, I sit down, do the math in my head and have a heart attack. It’s good times. It’s always fun to give yourself a little bit of cardiac arrest every day. Keeps you alert.

But there’s not a lot I can do. I can’t make people buy my stuff. I can’t beat them over the head until they give me money. That’s not nice. All I can do is share my stuff, paint like a total maniac and pray that I sell some stuff and cover the rest of my expenses, and get outta debt (mostly at least).

You know that saying, if you wanna catch the bus, pray and then run as fast as you can?

This is me. Running. Very quickly.

And I know I can do it. I talked to myself last night and we made a pact, to set outside our negative attitudes and doubt for the next 40 days, to get us out of here and do all of the things that we need to do. To set the fear aside for a while, put on our helmets and walk – no – tango into battle. We will fight on. We will win. And by golly, we will finish these paintings, get the money we need, and get out of here.

I also said a prayer to the Universe, asking for some help. I said that I was going to do what I love to do, and paint like a crazy person, and share my work, and that I would do what I could to get out of my own way, and if maybe it could send the rest of the funds my way, that would be awesom. I wasn’t very good at asking, and it may have actually looked like I was insulting the Universe, but hey – I’m not very good at asking for  help, okay?

All I can do now is keep on running. I don’t have all the answers, I don’t know what’s going to happen next, and I don’t know how I’m going to get the money or finish the show. But I’m going to do it. I can tell you that with confidence.

If you wanna help out, head on over to my secret sale of secret stuff and buy a couple cards or something. Every little bit helps, and I’d really appreciate it. It’d help me get some more paint and canvas for the show, and even things we need to leave, like oven mitts, or sheets.

At the very least, stick around and help me countdown my last 40 days of St. Catharines!